octubre 10, 2008

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to hide from the actual truth of myself, from what I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become as wanting to be always right and always having the 'right' answer for everything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that wanting to hide is merely desiring self preservation as what I still deem to be a 'good quality' within me as perceived intelligence by the mind which is useless in self honesty

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think believe and perceive that I'm being 'too stupid' the moment I ask obvious questions, the moment I already know the answer but think, believe or perceive that I'm able to get some mind perspective to entertain myself this is complete separation

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from people I deem as being lascivious and lustful not realizing, I am them, and by judging I am supporting the creation of this reality and my experience within it, therefore I STOP I do not accept and allow myself to still desire wanting to blame others for my experience instead of realizing: I am ALL I create my reality here within thoughts, therefore I stop thoughts to stop myself within this reality as what I experience currently

I forgive myself that Ihave accepted and allowed myself to feel inferiority towards others because of opportunities they get to travel to SA

i forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be defined now by a desire to go to SA

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to others that have already gone to the farm and thinking, believing and perceiving that they are 'ahead' of me, not realizing this isn't about being 'more' or 'further' in process, but about me realizing myself as here, therefore this isn't defined by anything or anyone but myself here

I forgive myself that I have accepted adn allowed myself for ever having experienced frustration and anger when having to wait for something to happen in my world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having ever gotten angry and frustrated when friends didn't arrive to our meetings 'on time' therefore, acting all angry and frustrated and mad at them because of them not having been 'on time'

I forgive myself tha tIhave accepted and allowed myself to define me as being sour at times when things 'wont' go my way'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel manipulated and feel completely frustrated while having to wait for someone to arrive in one meeting, because of feeling wasting time, not realizing, I'm always here, there's no time to lose

I forgive myself that Ihave accepted and allowed myself to ever feel used when having me waiting for long time and people nto giving a damn about it

I forgive myself that I have accpeted and allowed myself to always having thought or perceived that I wasn't 'important' to others therefore, belittling myself constantly and continuously

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire shooting or shouting at people in front of my house that are praying like parrots to a lifeless image

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge 'others' stupidity, not realizing, I am also them, so I stop judgment towards myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deem people as dumb for trusting an image as god

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear myself as falling back to the mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire shutting people off when they are praying

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become frustrated and experience anger while hearing people pray

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become extremely frustrated at myself for just wanting to be eating and not being able to stop myself apparently

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to unconditionally LIVE the Self forgiveness corrective application as me here, and instead judge and blame me for not doing so and in doing so, compounding my self dishonesty.

I STOP!!!!!!!1

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