abril 13, 2012

Self Acceptance

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define self-acceptance  as a point of ‘accepting my fuckups’ in separation of myself here as my human physical body, which isn’t a ‘fuckup’ but an actual living organism that I have separated myself from by existing only in a limited experience of myself as  my  mind, I am here to establish an actual physical-communication with myself, accepting and actually being equally-here as my physical body, after all the time that I spent neglecting myself as my physical body within the idea, belief and perception that ‘who I am is a spirit and not this physical vessel’ neglecting the common sensical aspect that I am in fact a living-breathing human being.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to taint the word ‘self-acceptance’ within a shade of ‘conformity’ or ‘submission’ as if accepting myself meant ‘not being able to do anything about myself, but just ‘accepting it’ as is’ – which in fact implies that I am not accepting myself as the full potential that I exist as within the realization of what it actually means to stand one and equal as the entirety of my physical human body. 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create ‘self-acceptance’ as a commodity that I gave to myself to ‘feel better about myself’ instead of actually understanding that it is not about creating an experience out of it, but actually just physically seeing myself here which requires No experience toward it, in any way whatsoever.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to color ‘self-acceptance’ with a positive shade wherein I could then use it as a way to remain ‘as I am’ without realizing that self-acceptance implies allowing myself to live to the utmost potential, which Implies that I actually have to work with myself to establish that full-potential as myself, and this is not a ‘full’ as in a ‘superiority’ full- but a single self-acceptance of what being one and equal as my physical body, that which is really here – implies.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ever having wanting to ‘change myself’ which is not accepting myself here, but only wanting to suit and morph into a ‘better idea’ of who I can be as a personality, as another presentation of myself, without realizing that actual self-acceptance has Nothing to do with me being a single ‘idea’ and ‘personality’ and ‘ego’ of the mind morphing and ‘evolving’ into something that is apparently ‘better.’ It is about accepting myself as the possibility and potential expression that is here as myself as my physical body. I realize that I can only neglect this point of self acceptance whenever I go into my mind and seek for a reason to 'exist’ here, a reason to ‘apply myself’ which is obviously in separation of myself being the directive principle of who and what I really am Here as the physical that is holding myself, sustaining myself here and that I can only honor by standing one and equal as myself, as my mind to the physical, which is here, breathing, self-directing within the principle of what’s best for all as the realization that: all that is here is self-me-here, I focus on establishing myself As my physical body.

 

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to color ‘Self-Acceptance’ with a shade of ‘surrendering’ to what I currently perceive myself to be as my mind and as a physical body that I haven’t even ever actually Occupied as myself as that complete awareness of who I really am as the physical body that is allowing me to walk this process to equalize myself as Life.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define ‘Self-Acceptance’ as a con.formity to myself as what I currently exist as, without realizing that Self Acceptance implies actually allowing myself to give to myself the full ability to stand one and equal as my physical body, which implies establishing a point of reality – real-physical living that I have never ever in fact experienced as myself.

This implies that any sense of ‘diminishment’ that I allowed myself to taint the word ‘Self-Acceptance’ with, is only a point of limitation that I caged the very word ‘Self-Acceptance’ with. I realize that I can only Live Self Acceptance by directing myself, here, as my physical body in every breath wherein I make sure I do not diminish myself in a single moment to become an emotion, a feeling, a thought as an experience of the mind. Self-Acceptance implies allowing me to LIVE for the very first time as my physical body and the potential that I have never even imagined could exist here as myself.

 

I mean the fact that the entirety of this existence can be held in a physical body implies that I have neglected the very OBVIOUS aspect that this process is revealing to ourselves. And still, it remained as a ‘gray area’ that I had chosen to only see as a ‘opportunity’ for a single being, yet not realizing that if such ability to stand one and equal as the entirety of existence is already Here as a physical body, then what could be tampering such ability to each one of us to accept as ourselves-  one and equal – ? At the moment, our mind, our desires and petty experiences that we have pondered upon an actual living potential.

Thus, self-acceptance implies at the moment, physically for myself within this moment in my process is establishing myself as my physical body, that is HERE and every moment allowing me to face my thoughts, my experiences as a direct reflection of ‘what I am doing to myself’ so that I can face it within Self-Honesty, and walk the necessary Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application  to ensure that I go closing all gaps that currently exist within me as my mind, as my physical body and actually become the directive principle – in equality – as the understanding of who I am as my mind, as my physical body and walking a physical process to breathe myself here, establish myself Here as the physical.

 

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to ever curse at my body for not being within the ‘right picture presentation’ that I thought/ accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself to. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a sense of regret for having done that – there is no need to create any experience upon the past judgments I held toward myself as my physical body.

 

The window of opportunity, the realization and the moment is here for me to establish Self-Acceptance as Who I Am – no past, no present, no future held in any way – it is here as breath, every moment – self-accepting self, here, breathing, walking, directing myself.

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