septiembre 01, 2012

139. The Commitment to #Live the #Words I Speak

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize how it is that I have lived only as a ‘spokesperson’ as the limited version of myself, the frightful and judgmental version of ‘who I am’ as my mind, which has never ever supported the expression of life as who I am.

When and as I see myself taking a moment to think my expression, I stop and I breathe – I realize that the words that are here as the expression of who I am as the physical is not to be ‘thought’ and pre-meditated, but to be walked as an actual moment of expression that I can stand as and be accountable for, as it is then words that can testify that which I am willing and deciding myself to be and live as in every moment.

I commit myself to walk myself as my mind, as that point of self-awareness as consciousness to then be in fact able to become aware of myself as the reality of who I am, as the actual ability and capability and potential that I exist as in order to - in every moment - decide to live as that living expression of me as the physical, which implies: no ego Is allowed as no ego can exist in the expression of life in equality, as ego/personality/ any character stands as superior/ inferior in a delusional form of self-abuse toward life.

I forgive myself  that I have accepted and allowed myself to  not realize that every moment that I dare to speak as the limited, personalized version of myself as the past of ‘who I as the character that I have become, I am in fact contradicting my decision to live within and as self-honesty in common sense, because I am in one single moment of ‘past-allowance,’ deciding to be the ‘who I am’ as the limited version of myself that is Not standing one and equal as my physical human body, as that which is real and that which functions according to what is best for all at all times.

When and as I see myself going into a past-habit of preferences, sayings, movements, gestures and quirks  that I have programmed according to the environment and people as memories in my mind/physical – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am re-enacting/ re-playing a pattern that I have imposed onto the physical that I am here walking as a point of self correction. Thus I allow myself to immediately stop, realize the correction as breathing and instead speaking in common sense, realizing and accepting the point missed in the moment to then in fact be congruent with the words I speak and the actions I participate in reality.

I commit myself to be here in every single moment whenever I am in a ‘comfort zone’ as that environment that I have conditioned a particular form of expression to. Within this it is to take such moments as an actual ‘live moment test’ to see whether I am still subject to the environment, people, places or if I am in fact living the absolute decision to at all times be the expression of who I am as the physical in every moment, wherein who I am is and stands as the actual expression of what which I see and realize is what exists as the expression of what I am here willing myself to live and stand as: equality as life as what’s Best for All, as the practical living, written and ‘doing’ process of ensuring I in fact correct the ‘real nature’ of who I am as my mind, as my own ‘configuration’ that I take self responsibility for.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see and realize how within my mind I created different values that I attached/ imposed to flesh and bones according to how I categorized the various and different expressions that exist here in this planet Earth,  just because of seeing them as ‘other species’ that because they could not ‘speak to me,’ I regarded as inferior and as such, remaining within the specicism ‘high ground’ above everything and even other humans beings, which reveals to what extent each one of us became the weapon of our choice to deploy a war toward ourselves/animals/the environment which is how and why we are currently facing the ‘art of our creation’ as the absolute reflection of every single point of self-separation we accepted and allowed ourselves to be and become.

When and as I see myself creating the slightest distinction between me and every other particle of everything that is here, I stop and I breathe – I realize that this separation can only exist in my mind as thoughts: instead I realize that who and what we are is one and equal from the very beginning, thus there cannot be anything separate from me and that any judgment I create upon anything/ anyone is only self judgment and a point of separation created by me in my mind, which is what I must take self responsibility for to equalize my expression as the physical that breathes and directs itself to support life in equality.

I commit myself to breathe here and when and while breathing, going correcting every single point wherein I see I am detaching/ separating myself from any other expression that is equally here as myself, that I am aware of or even unaware of which leads to also realizing that the thoughts that I cannot see, I must also take self responsibility for and equalize myself as my mind to be able to stand as the directive principle of who I am in my mind at all times.

I see and realize that Self Expression is always that which will enable life to be lived and experienced to the utmost potential and that I cannot speak/ express as life without walking the actual road to live the words I write and speak: this is the process of Self Responsibility, Self Correction and Self-Honesty:  the commitment to birth life from the physical

I forgive myself that I have ever accepted and allowed myself to use words to harm, abuse, judge others in separation of myself which I see and realize that implies the actual  ‘opening point’ as self forgiveness that I have missed for a long time, just because of not being self-aware of what I did and created as myself as every single word that I expressed in disregard of who I am as the physical body, as the breaths that I take to enable life to continue as my physical body.

When and as I see myself going ‘too fast’ speaking, I stop and I breathe – I allow myself to bring myself back to the physical to instead of saying a word in an ‘automated/fast mode,’ I give myself that moment to realize that the word that I am about to speak defines what I accept and allow myself to exist as in such moment. Thus, I allow myself to be HERE as breath, talking at the pace of the physical without rushing while speaking, as I see and realize that rushing while speaking is wanting to ‘get a point across’ as in wanting to ‘beat/ gain/ make a point’ the fastest way possible due to the previous associations of ‘fast speed = accuracy’

I commit myself to give myself a moment to breathe when expressing myself and communicating, to always ensure that I am aware of the words I speak as the ‘picture’ I decide to paint of and as myself for others and myself to see the world through and as me, which implies that I ensure I no longer paint the same picture over and over and over again, filled with lies, self judgment, blame, guilt, remorse, denigration or anger directed without awareness as I see and realize that we have built the world through the words that we have spoken in separation of ourselves as the physical that is and has Always been here, we just have not lived as one and equal as it.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to ever feel ‘righteous’ to ‘speak my mind’ without awareness/ from the starting point of enhancing my own ego, within he belief that ‘I had the right to express myself,’ never really even understanding what Expression is as I had never considered life in the physical as who I am, but only the ‘who I am’ as the ego of the mind seeking to be fulfilled with a positive experience within the consideration that ‘who I am’ must always ‘defend itself,’ never realizing how in this ‘defense mode’ I only created a battle against myself in the inner and the outer

When and as I see myself going into a ‘righteous expression,’ I stop and I breathe, I ground myself/ humble myself again to see and realize that the moment I am wanting to create a ‘higher’ tonality and expression in my words, I am in fact characterizing the words instead of speaking them here as breath, wherein I can ensure that I am the directive principle at all times of the voice tonality, the speed, the presence of myself as words in expression in all ways.

I commit myself to slow myself down when communicating to not want to ‘say it all at once,’ as life is actually a process that goes breath by breathe – thus I equalize myself as the expression of the physical wherein breath by breath I go integrating myself here to be and become aware of every word I speak being in consideration of who I am and who I am communicating myself with to ensure that an actual understanding takes place, as I see and realize that every word that I speak will resonate within another and that I thus must ensure that I can stand by the words I speak indefinitely, and that the only way to ensure this is if the expression coming out of my mouth is here as the expression of who I am in common sense as the physical – this is the process.

I commit myself to breathe before speaking, as the realization that bringing myself here in/ as the physical is the starting point at all times to ensure the communication as the words I decide to express myself as are in fact the representation/ depicting the realization of who I am as the physical within the consideration of what’s best for all, as Life that is yet to be born here in the physical.

Let’s continue walking.

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